Step One - Adoption Couple Orientation

In early March of this year while teaching on a Catholic SST (Spring of Service Training) at the Twin Oaks base of Youth with a Mission (YWAM) in Garden Valley TX, I witnessed the inspiring testimony of a Godly woman who shared a common history of infertility and loss through miscarriage.  One part of her testimony struck such a deep cord and from that moment I knew that God was inviting me to open my heart fully to the gift of adoption. 

This lady volunteered at 'Fatherheart,' a maternity home for young women experiencing an unwed pregnancy.  She and her husband had grown their family through adopting two children affectionately known as 'Fatherheart babies' by those connected to the ministry.  Fatherheart Maternity home (www.livalt.org/fatherheart.html) is one part of the 'Living Alternatives' ministry which also includes a crisis pregnancy center and 'Loving Alternative Adoption Agency.' 

After sharing our stories she asked if we were interested in adoption and if so, informed us that 'Loving Alternatives' was having their once-a-year adoption couple orientation that coming weekend. She wasn't sure what our chances would be of being accepted at such short notice, but gave us the number of the office. We promptly called and left a message that very Sunday evening.  The caseworker who responded  the next morning was a little wary and cautioned us that most couples take several months of prayer and discernment before filling out and submitting the application papers and couple questionnaire.  However, once she heard that we had been discerning for some time she accepted to have us fill out the Adoptive Couple Questionnaire, which is the preliminary step for adoption with their agency. She agreed to put it in the mail that very day.  She had to receive our completed questionnaire by that Wednesday to check us out before we could be given the green light to attend.  Needless to say we were scrambling to get it all done and faxed back to her but praise God they seemed to like us and told us we could come and bring the remaining paperwork with us to the orientation.  Well, God opened that door and we proceeded to walk through it!

Garden Valley Bible Church

The orientation was held at a small, non-denominational church nestled among the East Texas pine and oak trees.  We were among 35 couples seeking to learn about the ministry all with hopes to adopt the 3-10 infants that they place each year!  They also have a program to adopt older children and it was clear that some of the couples were also interested in doing that.  What took us by surprise during the couple's introduction session was the proportion of couples who already had biological children.  We thought we would be frowned upon, already having two beautiful children to enjoy, but God showed us that He was touching the hearts of many, already established families to welcome some of His lost children into secure and loving homes.  This gave us so much peace and confidence about our reason and decision for adopting too. 

The orientation took us through the definition of 'covenant adoption' - a process in which the adoptive couple, birth family and the agency enter into the adoption process together, creating a plan based on love, trust and promise to keep the highest interest of the child in mind throughout the growing up years.  This involves a face to face meeting before the delivery of the child and at placement.  After placement, contact between the families is maintained through letters, pictures and gifts that are monitored by the agency.  The Biblical principles for this type of adoption process were outlined and the nitty gritty of fees and timelines were presented.  

In the afternoon we heard testimonies from an adoptive couple who had adopted all three of their children through the agency, we even got to meet the children.  We heard from a birth mother who had been through the maternity home twice and had placed both of her daughters with the same family. It was through her stories that we truly came to appreciate the painful sacrifice it is to surrender your child into the arms of another. Finally we heard from a young man who had been adopted.  He shared about the relationship he has with his birth mother and with his parents  and siblings (who were also present and gave some wonderful advice).  It was truly a beautiful weekend and we grew more and more in love with the work of mercy this agency performs in their ministry to birth mothers and their babies.

By the end of the weekend those who wished to continue their adoption journey with the agency were asked to put their name on the Home Study waiting list.  Now began the wait to be contacted about when our Home study was likely to take place.  With only 3 full-time caseworkers available to conduct home studies and knowing we were quite a distance from Tyler, we didn't get our hopes up too high to have one done quickly.